Maybe I’m so good in convincing myself that I’m okay being alone that it is somehow hardwired in me that I prefers to be alone.

Don’t get me wrong. I know that having some time for yourself can be a good way of learning to appreciate yourself. I’m okay with eating alone, shopping alone, going on a “me date” by myself (tried it all before).

However, once you settled down during a class where everyone seem to have their own friends/gang.

Those laughter and conversation around you while you’re just sitting there in the middle.

Whereas the phone is your only companion.

That is when I felt lonely.

Its a complicated thing honestly. I know I matter in someone else life, but this moment, this exact moment I’m breathing admist the crowd, a hole just suddenly appear in my heart. I’m like the exact same circle in a polka-dots blouse.

This moment, I am invisible. I did not exist.

…………………………………..
……………………….
………………
………….
………

However, I want to make it clear to you that there are many points in your life that you will feel this way. You feel underappreciated. You feel like you didn’t matter.

Perhaps you didn’t even want to live anymore.

But it is only for NOW.

Breathe. It’s only for now.

Hope exists in future.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s